I was going through some old boxes of stuff and found a couple of CDs of photos from my US road trip in 2005! I had completely forgotten I had them and haven’t looked at them for years! A little bit of editing and they are ready to post (see link in the Photostream column on the left) Looking at them is a weird experience, I was in a very different place in my life then, and I feel like I look so different too. Although I am sure I do look older now than I do in these (but not too much actually – PHEW!) I feel like I also look more “alive” somehow now. I guess experience, both good and bad, does bring depth to your personality and character. I think in these days I was only living out about a quarter of my full “potential” and I am no where near to 100% now, but I am definitely a whole lot closer and moving closer all the time. It made me think, this is part of the reason I love photographs so much. They really do frame a moment in time, and when it is YOUR moment in time, for me it’s almost like I step back into it, in a Harry Potter’s “Pensieve” style.
I think I do have a very visual memory, more than any other sense, as I remember all the thoughts, feelings, tastes and textures as if I was standing there again. This sensitivity is as I have mentioned before I think, is the reason why I am really ruthless about giving away material things that have anything other than a good “vibe” to me. For example I am totally unable to keep a CD / book / necklace that someone has given me, or was bought together, unless the memories generated by it are 100% good, which in the case of the end of most friendships or relationships just isn’t the case. I know some people keep everything good and bad, as it’s a kind of tangible part of their history and life, and when they look at the stuff they remember, but I am guessing they don’t feel it energy wise, the way I FEEL it. And that’s why as per yesterdays post I loved wearing my Mums jewellery because to me it really is special. And why generally I like most to wear jewellery that’s been given as a gift, because to me it seems to carry that persons energy in it somehow, I guess aside from the whole status side of the history of jewellery that is its symbolic purpose.
But back to the photos, although they were taken on an early digital compact camera, so the quality isn’t great, I can see that it’s me that took them. I can recognise my own style from even then, when I didn’t even own my own camera and hadn’t really taken any photographs for years. Just like now, when during a session someone else borrows my camera and takes a shot, 99% of the time in editing, even if I cant remember whether I took a certain shot or not, I can immediately see whether it’s mine. Which is kinda cool, because it means I must have SOME KIND of photographic style / signature. Project 365 has been an awesome way to make me commit to making photography part of my everyday life, and as a result I feel like I am getting much more confident and pushing my own boundaries more and more.
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